Posted on by hrchow12

How to Find More Books You’ll Love in Two Easy Steps

So I have found in the last few years that many, many of the popular books on social media are… not my type of story. Unfortunately, because I’m on social media a lot, I was leaning into Bookstagram recommendations to fill up my to-be-read list (TBR), and it wasn’t working out great. Even books with a high Goodreads rating or on Goodreads “must read” lists just weren’t hitting for me, and it was putting me in frequent reading slumps (feeling like you don’t want to read or have to force yourself to read).

In the depths of the reading slump, I would think the problem was me and force myself to keep reading a book to the end. But then, I would find a book that I would just get SUCKED INTO and felt like devouring—like I couldn’t put it down. And I realized, it’s not me or the book, but rather a book-reader mismatch. And often, the book I found engrossing and unputdownable, wasn’t my ‘typical’ kind of book.

So I started giving myself permission to DNF books any time after the 10% mark. Even if the books were “okay,” that’s not the sensation I was looking for. I want books that hooked me with their characters and voice and world. I wanted to find books that I LOVED—that I could scream about. If I didn’t feel like I *had* to keep reading, I would put it down.

Which means, naturally, I DNF a *lot* of books. For example, I’ve DNF’d ~30 books in the last ~45 days. In that same timeframe, though, I’ve finished 4 books, 3 of which were 5-star reads for me. I don’t really see a DNF as any kind of judgment on a book except “not the right read for me at this time”, and though I put them on my DNF Goodreads shelf, I don’t give them a rating or review.

I download a ton of books on the Libby app, listen to the first 10%, and then decide, essentially, which 1 or 2 I’d like to keep reading. I think of it as browsing in a bookstore and sitting down to read the first 1-2 chapters before deciding if I want to keep reading.

Now the next natural question is: well that’s a lot of books to buy not to actually finish any of them. How do you not go broke?! And the easy answer to that is, I use the library. Which is freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Specifically, because I am an audiobook listener, I use the Libby App with my library card number. Then I can download ~20ish books at a time and sample them pretty quickly to find the ones that are right for me.

Since sampling a book is very low risk when it comes to money or time, I feel free to step outside of my normal reading zone in terms of genre to try a broad variety of things of all kinds of popularities. When I’m out of reads, I simply sort “Audiobooks” by “Latest Added” with the filter of “Available now” and download the first 20 that aren’t sequels and I haven’t sampled before.

Because honestly, I don’t care what anyone else rated the book—I want to find the ones perfect for me. And, real talk, I am extremely picky. So before I go on a road trip, I make sure my library loans are maxed out! It also makes it fun to go into the book without any preconceived notions except the title and the cover—I’m so often genuinely surprised, and it’s a super fun feeling.

So yeah, if you came here for the two easy steps, here they are:

1.      Use your library to check out as many books as you can at a time across a wide spectrum of genre and popularity and heck, even audience.

2.      Read the first 10% to find the ones that demand that you keep reading, and DNF the rest.

I’m sure this process won’t work for everyone, but I’ve found that I read SO MUCH MORE this way. I finished more books than ever before last year, with more books that I truly loved than before. And I’m on track to beat that record this year. Not that speed matters, but what’s really important is that I’ve managed to avoid those reading slumps and find the right books for me at the right time. Highly recommend.

Love your Library because it loves youuuu.

Thanks for reading!

Posted on by hrchow12

Book Review – Number the Stars

I read this one aloud to my 7-year-old and 9-year-old on our vacation. There was lots to discuss and learn about the Holocaust, WWII and what it means to be brave. They kept asking me to keep reading and in the end, they both said they “liked it.” (My kids rate books on a 3-star scale: I loved it, I liked it, or not for me.) It was a super fast read that kept us turning pages, and I definitely recommend it, especially if you’re looking for a read-aloud historical fiction that kids will both understand and want to talk about.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

A classic for a reason!

Thanks for reading!

Posted on by hrchow12 · 6 Comments

How to Find Confidence as an Author Amid Failure and Rejection

So, if you’ve been following my end-of-the-year writing wrap-up posts, I think we can all agree that I ended on a little bit of a downer at the end of 2025. Between the looming creative apocalypse that is genAI and my own personal odyssey of submission, I will readily admit that I came into 2026 floundering and a little hopeless about the prospects of my writing career.

So, I set my focus for 2026 to make myself slow down, search for balance, and re-center on my joy of the craft. My Fantasy Horror manuscript went on sub in February, and then I took to writing craft books. I was lucky enough to stumble upon Ray Bradbury’s Zen in the Art of Writing, and it was honestly the perfect book that I needed to shove me out of my mental spiral.

Somewhere along the way, I’d gotten caught up in the idea of “author career success” defining the worth of my words. I’m sure if you’re reading this, that probably makes sense to you as well. But when my mind was slanted in that direction, all I could think of was the need for a manuscript to succeed on submission. But when that thought consumed me, every day without a new book deal felt like a failure. So to try to escape that negative mindset, I tried to shift my thinking to assume that all my submission would be failures. That way, I figured if I was perpetually prepared for the worst, then I could be inured against rejection.

Honestly, it was a step forward, but it was still kind of a hopeless mentality. It was only when Zen in the Art of Writing really reminded me that success, big or small, isn’t the point at all. But rather the joy and honesty of it. The point is to mine the originality of our own experience to more fully perceive the world around us.

And you might look at that, and think, “well, obviously, Hayley.” But knowing a thing and your bones knowing a thing are two different beasts entirely. Only when I’d accepted the inherent worth of my own words and the exercise of writing—two things that no rejection could ever steal from me—was I able to relax again. I felt free to write what I *needed* to write. To take my time. To soak it in. To enjoy creation and the truths it reveals to myself. To, as Ray Bradbury put it, get “busy loving and hating.”

Once solidly in this new headspace, I then felt weirdly confident. Because I knew, naturally, that I’ve survived hundreds of rejections, and that any matter of hundreds more would not blow my ship over. That I didn’t have to bow to the pressures of industry to burn my little free time to attempt to be a prolific social media marketer first. Because I’d re-found the “why” of my writing. And if we want to get into a Nietzsche quote here, “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how,”—the  same goes for writing.

Some come what may of our ‘how’—rejections, genAI slop, traditional publishing follower-requirements—I have my ‘why.’ And if you’re a creative struggling with these same realities, I hope you’re able to take a moment to re-center yourself and your work as well. Highly recommend.

Don’t let the genAI slop win.

Thanks for reading!

Posted on by hrchow12 · 3 Comments

Book Review – Zen in the Art of Writing

I’ve read quite a few writing craft books at this point, and I’ll be honest, quite a few of them are misses for me, but I really enjoyed this one. I’ve definitely been feeling a little lost in my author life, and this was *exactly* the book I needed. Bradbury’s writing is straight up mesmerizing, the descriptions of his journey, writing process, inspirations, and advice were fascinating, and in general, I think he gets straight at the heart of writing. I absolutely recommend it, but know going in, this is less concrete advice about how to write, and more about finding the balance amidst industry pressures and motivations – about centering on the art in our writing and ourselves.

A Favorite Quote: “The faster you blurt, the more swiftly you write, the more honest you are. In hesitation is thought. In delay comes the effort for a style, instead of leaping upon truth which is the only style worth deadfalling or tiger-trapping.”

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Thanks, Ray, I needed this one.

Thanks for reading!

Posted on by hrchow12

NYC Midnight Challenge – Scary Story Challenge – Second Round – The Lesser of Two Devils

The Lesser of Two Devils

January 2025 (Second Round)
Scare: Road Trip
Action: Getting A Sunburn
Character: A Scammer
Time Constraint: 48 hours
Length: 400 words

I shouldn’t be doing this—driving into the desert with a sack of money is a sign you’ve taken a wrong turn somewhere. But when your sister’s sicko ‘boyfriend’ calls you at the devil’s hour so you can hear her scream for rescue, you follow her down whatever path you must.

The foster homes my sister and I survived forged us into a package deal, so it didn’t take long for Jeff to figure out how to scam us. At this point, we practically reek of famished desperation, with an aversion to law enforcement that must’ve seemed irresistible.

So I hurtle toward the remote coordinates with my heart in my throat. Hunger gnaws at my belly, and my skin burns under the sun’s rays through my open windows whistling in the desiccated air.

An eternity passes before I arrive at the tall rock formation where two cars squat in the shade. Three men surround Grace where she sits, gagged and zip-tied, at their feet. Adrenaline races through me.

This is evil.

Still, I park the car and step onto the sandy earth with shaky legs. “I have the money.” My voice cracks, and I try to swallow, but all the moisture has left my mouth. Everything rides on this.

“Toss it over.” Jeff’s lip curls. “Keys too.”

And there it is. My sister raises her gaunt, tear-streaked face, and a bleak realization jumps between us. I want to tell her I’m sorry, that I’d turn back the clock to a time before monsters if I could. Instead, I throw the items to Jeff. “Let Grace go.”

Their lascivious sneers twist into a deeper ugliness. “And now we have two,” Jeff chuckles.

I scan the desert, but it will bear no witness, so I meet Grace’s pleading gaze. “It’s okay.”

Her shoulders sag, and as the men stalk forward, I let out a shaky breath of pure—

Relief.

Finally, we can eat.

Grace breaks her bindings, and her teeth sink into Jeff’s throat before he can scream. Crimson paints the golden sand as we feast.

Because, yes, we are evil.

And we shouldn’t be doing this.

But in this corner of Death Valley, the larger devils feast on the smaller ones—and we refuse to be small anymore.

After all, if this is the path I must take to feed my sister, I’ll take a road trip through hell any day.

This one came in fifth place in my group and advanced me to the final round. The feedback is below!

WHAT THE JUDGES LIKED ABOUT YOUR STORY

{2124}  “The Lesser of Two Devils” creates a believable bond between these two sisters almost immediately, which is essential to carrying the story. You can feel the care the protagonist has for Grace, especially in the paragraph where she wants to apologize.

{1943}  Wow. This was a very surprising and intriguing story. I liked the reference to the devil in the first paragraph, which created a strong atmosphere and frightening tone at the start of the story. The characterization of Jeff was very strong. I shuddered at him insisting she threw the money and the keys, and I got chills at the statement “And now we have two.” The sudden energy as Grace broke through and attacked Jeff was startling and thrilling. I loved this idea of the “larger devils” feasting on the smaller ones. This was an extremely satisfying ending!

{2376}  You do an excellent job of hooking the reader in with a compelling opening line, and the way you establish the intense stakes with the image of Grace screaming for help over the phone sparks a riveting sense of suspense. The way you leave the reader to assume that our character is way over her head while subtly setting up the reveal to come is some really impressive writing, and the surface tension of the scene before Grace breaks her bindings leaves the reader hanging in dread for the moment we think we’re headed for. The reversal of Grace biting Jeff is one of the best twists I’ve seen anywhere in a long time. And the way that you bring everything together with the callbacks to earlier lines as the story winds down leaves the reader with a delightfully dark ending.

WHAT THE JUDGES FEEL NEEDS WORK

{2124} Although it’s clear that “The Lesser of Two Devils” is stepping carefully in an attempt to set up its reveal, the first half of this story feels disconnected from the second. There’s a hard pivot from Grace seeming helpless to being a monster in no real danger from Jeff. In a longer story, there would be ample space to explore what moral and emotional concerns could be leashing Grace while keeping all of the introduction and more. There isn’t the case here. Consider trimming details in the first half of this story in order to make room for foreshadowing and hints that something beyond physical limitations is constraining Grace (something that would also help characterize her and her sister more). If done tactfully, this won’t give anything away while also making the story smoother. As far as suggestions for cutting, it might be beneficial to trim the sentence-long description of our protagonist’s dry mouth. Also consider condense the introduction – particularly the last sentence; do we need the “aversion to law enforcement” portion? Would “isolation” or another word work in its stead? How many instances of “and” could you cut from this story; how many adjectives are truly pulling their weight? You’re good at what you do. Condense this story to its desperate, nasty core.  

{1943}  I felt that at times, your sentences became a little long and unwieldy. For example, I wasn’t sure that you needed “whistling in the desiccated air” at the end of the paragraph describing her driving towards her sister. You might also consider phrases such as “but all the moisture has left my mouth”, where you’d already shown that she was struggling to swallow. We knew it was hot, so I’m not sure we needed this detail. I wasn’t sure that you needed the quotation marks around “boyfriend” in your first paragraph. I found this a bit distracting, and it created a pause in the flow of the story just as you were pulling us in. I would simply call him her sicko boyfriend, and let us figure out that he was untrustworthy, which you’d really told us with the fact that he was a “sicko”. If the intention was to show us that he wasn’t actually her boyfriend because Grace was conning Jeff by pretending to be his girlfriend, this also felt unnecessary. I would simply let us assume that he was her boyfriend before this drama unfolded. 

{2376}  There’s so much already going right in this story, but something you might consider in a potential revision would be end with the line “and we refuse to be small anymore.” The final line of the current draft leaves us with a satisfying punchline that releases the tension you’ve built up so well, but something you might try instead would be to let the tension linger, leaving the reader with a more ominous cliffhanger of an ending with the suggestion that this is only the beginning and these sisters are now out for revenge. Another idea you might consider would be to provide a hint of what’s to come in the line “My sister raises her gaunt, tear-streaked face, and a bleak realization jumps between us.” You do such a great job of sustaining the misdirection right up to the moment of the reveal, but you might also try pulling a thread loose by tweaking this line so that Grace does something unexpected. If, for example, you recast this line as something like a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth in place of the bleak realization, you could present the reader with a strange moment that will spark a sense of mystery, leaving us with the feeling that we should’ve seen the twist coming, even if the story’s so well constructed that there’s no way we ever would.

Thanks for reading! You can find the rest of my NYC Midnight Challenge entries and feedback here.

Posted on by hrchow12

Book Review – Creating Characters: The Complete Guide to Populating Your Fiction

Since this one has articles from various authors on the same topics, there’s a lot of repetition in this one. I don’t remember what “recommended writing craft books” list I found this on, but it wasn’t my favorite.

Favorite Quote: “The further you stray from reader expectation, the more obligated you are to explain how you got there.”

Still searching for the writing craft book I need in my life. I know it’s out there!

Thanks for reading!

Posted on by hrchow12

NYC Midnight Challenge – Scary Story Challenge – First Round – A Siren Calls

A Siren Calls

October 2025 (First Round)
Scare: Tomorrow
Action: Updating
Character: A Doorman
Time Constraint: 48 hours
Length: 400 words

The emergency sirens split the scream-ridden air as we race toward the shelter. The alarms have been going off for hours now, and at this point, I doubt there’s anyone left to turn them off. Shattering glass and gunshots pepper the panicked streets as the clock ticks toward midnight, the uncanny lights hovering above the city. Sophie clings to me as I run while tugging Liam along with one hand and updating my voicemail with our destination for the friends and family I couldn’t reach.

“What about Daddy?” Liam shrieks as we dodge around a raving drunk.

“He’ll meet us there.” The lie is sour on my tongue, but I wasted so much time trying to contact my shifty ex-husband with the tomorrow ultimatum breathing down our necks. I gave him as many minutes as I could, but nightmares require sacrifices.

We turn the corner, and finally the solid concrete building of town hall comes into view with four minutes left.

A tall man in a bullet-proof vest with a rifle slung over his shoulder stands in front of the door. Chest heaving, I stagger up to him and flash the email on my phone. “We’re assigned to this shelter.”

A baseball cap obscures his eyes, and a neck gaiter is pulled up over his nose, muffling his voice. “We’re full.”

I freeze, blood roaring in my ears as Sophie whimpers into my shoulder. “But they said we’d be safe here,” I say. “Where else are we supposed to go?”

“Go home,” the doorman says.

I shove my phone in his face, only two minutes left and sweat running down my nose. “We’ll never make it.”

“Andrea.” The doorman squeezes my arms, and I finally recognize my ex, his gaze fervent. “It’s full.”

The siren falls silent and with it, the city, as if the world collectively holds its breath.

“But, Matt, they’re feeding…” Tears trickle down my cheeks, and my gaze darts to the threatening lights now blotting out the darkness. I tried to protect my babies. I swear, God, I tried.

The hungry lights pinpoint the building, and a massive, inhuman shadow drops from the sky onto the roof. I gasp, my body going rigid. They’re coming for us.

Matt folds us in his arms, hiding Liam’s face. “Don’t look.”

And when the screams start, and blood sprays the windows from the inside—I remember.

Nightmares require sacrifices.

This one came in third place in my group and advanced me to round 2. The feedback is below!

WHAT THE JUDGES LIKED ABOUT YOUR STORY

{2549}  The setting is super interesting and creatively sci-fi creepy. I loved it! The story’s urgency is evident through word choices (nouns and verbs) such as emergency sirens, split, shrieks, roaring, and the world collectively holds its breath. The twist in the end, where Matt seems to allow the people IN the shelter to become the sacrifice, is quite unexpected. Nice job.  

{2144}  I really like the set up of the story and the way you drop us right in the middle of the action. The sounds of the chaos around the narrator and her children, them having to run to the shelter with just minutes to spare, and the blaring sirens all really provide a lot of tension and urgency to the story from the very get-go. I also really love the silence that happens the minute it actually turns to midnight. The sudden change in atmosphere really gives a quick glimpse of the scale of things to come. 

{2573}  That last line sent a proper shiver down my spine! This was such a complex story to fit into such a small word count and I really liked the sci-fi aspect of it. The shifty ex-husband that turns out to be protecting her was a nice touch. Updating the voicemail with a location was a brilliant way to include the prompt – really original! I liked the twist too – that the safe zone she’d been assigned to was in fact a kill shelter of sorts. The whole piece had very WWII vibes to it, with the sirens and gunfire feeling reminiscent of the blitz, and the town hall feeling like a gas chamber. Add a little War of the Worlds and you’re right there. I don’t know if that was intentional, but it brought to mind a very vivid picture for me.

WHAT THE JUDGES FEEL NEEDS WORK

{2549}  A craft issue of clarity happens here: “I wasted so much time trying to contact my shifty ex-husband with the tomorrow ultimatum breathing down our necks. I gave him as many minutes as I could, but nightmares require sacrifices.” Specifically, what is the tomorrow ultimatum, why does it matter, and how come it’s not mentioned again? Does it have a connection to the story’s ending? Clarity is perhaps the most important writing element to master in flash fiction because we get so few words to get the meaning across. You can fix the issue in a couple of ways. 1. Cut the reference. (I realize that also takes out “tomorrow,” but the revision is still valid. 2. Clarify what the narrator means by “tomorrow.” Again, does it foreshadow the ending? If so, help the reader understand that better. All the best to you!  

{2144}  I think the set up is so great and provides instant momentum to the story, but I’m not quite sure if I follow why Matt doesn’t let the narrator and his kids into the shelter. Is the shelter actually full? Or is Matt just being a jerk? If he also had access to the shelter, why did he not tell the protagonist and her children? I just think that the series of events as Matt denies them entry need to be a little more cohesive so we can understand why the narrator and her children are left to danger. I also think in general it would be helpful to have a line or two more about the ultimatum. I don’t quite understand what the advantage is of staying home versus being in the shelters, and more information about that would help us understand the importance of these final seconds and why it all comes down to that to try to get to a new location. 

{2573}  It’s a small thing, but I would have liked to know a bit more about the Tomorrow Ultimatum, because I didn’t really have a sense of what was happening right up until the end. I appreciate that the word count is tight, but you could take out the sentence about the alarms having been going off for hours, which would give you a few words to build the threat round the ultimatum.

Thanks for reading! You can find the rest of my NYC Midnight Challenge entries and feedback here.

Posted on by hrchow12

Book Review – Dialogue by Robert McKee

So I read Story by McKee and couldn’t really get into it, and unfortunately, I felt the same way about this one. A lot of these elements feel repetitive, and are illustrated through in-depth analysis of selected screenplays. Personally, I felt like it read like a super dry textbook without as many insightful nuggets as I would’ve hoped for. In general, the way the information is presented just didn’t really hit for me, but it could work for you!

Favorite Quote: “The more emotional people become, the shorter the words and sentences they use; the more rational people become, the longer the words and sentences they use.”

Honestly, finding a compelling writing craft book is tough. There are a few that I’ve loved… but I’ve tried quite a few at this point. Still, I’m always looking for ways to improve my writing, so I’ll keep at it!

Thanks for reading!

Posted on by hrchow12

NYC Midnight Challenge – 250 words – Second Round – A Meowchiavellian Matchmaker

A Meowchiavellian Matchmaker

January 2025 (Second Round)
Genre: Romantic Comedy
Action: Measuring Height
Word: Memo
Time Constraint: 48 hours
Length: 250 words

When I agreed to cat-sit for Grandma, I wasn’t expecting a life-or-death situation, but there I was, brandishing tuna beneath a tree as I tried to talk my feline nemesis down from a slow suicide.

Thankfully, thirty hours after my online cry for help, a pickup rolled into Grandma’s drive. But when Adonis himself stepped out of the truck, my brain officially broke. His biceps flexed as he swept a hand through his dark hair, long lashes framing stunning blue eyes.

Only then did I realize I hadn’t put a bra on or even looked in a mirror in the last two panic-stricken days.

Was this my punishment for secretly putting Meowchiavelli on a diet?

Adonis lifted his phone, a measuring app glowing on the screen. “Poor guy’s forty feet up.” He winked. “I’m glad you called.”

“R-right,” I stammered, memorizing the face of my desperation-induced hallucination. In minutes, he’d thrown a rope over a branch and pulled himself skyward—a true hero in action.

But just as he reached for Meowchiavelli, the cat scrambled back and fell off the branch. I screamed as the cat tumbled onto Grandma’s second-story roof, and in a streak of orange lightning, bolted to the porch and through his cat door.

Adonis returned to the ground with pink cheeks. “Uh, sorry about that. Still working on the technique.”

Finally, my brain rebooted. “Maybe we could talk about it over dinner?”

When he nodded with a sheepish grin, I decided I liked Meowchiavelli after all.

Alas, this one didn’t place, but the feedback is below!

WHAT THE JUDGES LIKED ABOUT YOUR STORY

{2415} In “A Meowchiavellian Matchmaker,” the writer does an excellent job pulling the reader into the story with the narrator’s fun, conversational voice. The love-hate dynamic between the narrator and Meowchiavelli also adds some wonderful and hilarious beats as the narrator builds up the courage to ask her Adonis cat savior to dinner.

{1943} This story really made me smile! The premise was cute, and the characters were vividly portrayed. I laughed at the way our poor protagonist realized that she hadn’t put on a bra or even looked in the mirror for two days! The contrast with the gorgeous looking Adonis was stark, creating a delightful tension as we wondered what he thought of her. The cat rescue was entertaining – I laughed as Meowchiavelli shot off the roof, to the porch, and in through his cat door. What a great moment! I loved the invitation to dinner at the end, and I really wanted to see what happened next, after his adorable meet-cute. 🙂

{2376} This is a funny and engaging story driven by a strong character. The way that you introduce us to our main character through a narrative voice that’s in turns vulnerable and acerbic not only hooks the reader in, but also immediately connects us with her. The way that she describes Adonis not only establishes her desire, it also establishes a wonderful sense of suspense. And the way that you reverse that feeling of suspense, revealing Adonis to be a fallible as embarrassed as our MC, makes for an unexpected twist that sets up a romantically satisfying ending.

WHAT THE JUDGES FEEL NEEDS WORK

 {2415}  This story is such a delight to read, with a fun narrator and cat hijinks leading to an adorable meet cute. If you were looking to develop this story further, there was only one moment where I wished we could have had closer access to the narrator’s perspective. You do such a fabulous job keeping us in the narrator’s emotional state–such as when she begs Meowchiavelli to come down from the tree and then sees the hot guy exiting his truck–but in this climatic moment as she watches Meowchiavelli’s descent, I felt a little emotionally distanced from the narrator. We see she screams, but after her vivid language and imagery in the story’s opening, I didn’t share the narrator’s tension and fright at this moment. I understand adding more to the story isn’t possible with the limited word count, but I honestly don’t think you need more. Perhaps reframing what you already have and positioning it more firmly through the narrator’s emotional pov (maybe heightening your word choices so they mirror the narrator’s fear more) might help raise the tension of this climactic moment before the narrator dares to ask her cat rescuer to dinner.  

{1943}  I felt that your story became stronger and stronger as it progressed. I did wonder about the opening paragraph. Could we open with showing her with the tuna under the tree – maybe writing this scene more directly? Then, could you show us in a more subtle way that she was cat sitting for her grandmother? For me, phrases such as “I wasn’t expecting a life-or-death situation” felt a little too much like telling instead of showing, whereas the idea of her trying to talk the cat down from the tree was entertaining and intriguing. Perhaps you could be more specific about the cry for help from Adonis. Could you show us who he was, perhaps with a detail such as a sign on the truck? Again, this felt rather like telling – could you find a way to show us instead? 

{2376}  There’s a lot already going right in this story, but something to consider in a potential revision would be to tweak the way that Adonis arrives on the scene. The line in the current draft about how Adonis shows up thirty hours after an online cry for help is funny, but also presents the reader with more questions than the story has time to answer–why does it take so long for Adonis to arrive? Is he a stranger from the internet or someone she knows? Perhaps shrinking the time frame or even separating Adonis from the cry for help (having it that she puts out the call only to have this friendly stranger stop as they’re driving by) would simplify his arrival in a way that keeps the reader fully engaged in the story. One other, small, thing would be to rephrase the line “desperation-induced hallucination.” This is another funny line, but it also invites the reader to wonder if our MC is imagining Adonis entirely, which doesn’t seem to be the story’s intent.

Thanks for reading! You can find the rest of my NYC Midnight Challenge entries and feedback here.

Posted on by hrchow12

Audiobook Review – Lianna and the Hombit

I really enjoyed this heartfelt middle-grade fantasy! Going through a difficult time in her life, Lianna is an easy protagonist to root for as she untangles her late father’s legacy, comes to terms with her grief, and adapts to her new life. Her magical, birdlike Hombit companion is definitely a source of light and fun in the story, and it was a pleasure to follow them as they untangled some of the secrets around them. Told in a very classical style with a magical flavor and solid narration, I recommend to anyone looking for an enchanting middle grade story with undercurrents of mystery (especially for fans of Troy’s Lucky Diamond series.) Thanks so much to the author for the Audible ARC, and you can grab your own copy here!

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

I’m always here for a sweet middle-grade read!

Thanks for reading!