Let’s talk about navigating rejection and negative feedback for a second. Honestly, it was something I’d never really thought about before I wrote my first book (mostly because I didn’t actually think I’d ever publish it.)

Fast forward a minute to first readers, betas, critique partners, editors, queries, and then reviews. Whoa! Negative feedback non-figuratively everywhere!

So how do you keep writing with someone calling your book baby ugly from the second it’s born until quite possibly… forever?!? How do you keep submitting when you’re getting truckloads of rejections? Well, here are the tips I can offer:

Pre-Publishing Feedback

• Put on the playlist. (see below)

• Let the feedback sit and percolate. Trust me, it’ll sting less the second time, and you’ll be able to more objectively see the changes you do and don’t want to make.
  • After I got the development edit back on my first book, I had to let it sit for three months before I gathered the energy to re-attack. (The feedback was BRUTAL 😆)

• Trim the feedback to actionable bullets in your own words. It’s less overwhelming than big blocks of text, and you can cross them off when you’re done.

• If you’re not sure if you want to accept the suggestion, ask another beta reader. If one beta thinks it’s a problem, it’s an opinion, if two betas think it’s a problem, it’s a problem. Just make sure you’re asking betas you can trust to be honest.

• Just because you accept it’s a problem, doesn’t mean you have to accept their suggested solution. There are a million ways to address a problem. Always revise in a way that feels right to you.

• Find critique partners and beta readers you can trust and build the relationship over time. The more trust there is between you, the more honest you’ll be with each other, and the more fun it’ll be!

Rejection

• Put on the playlist. (see below)

• Delete it! (After you log it in your querying excel sheet and hide that row, of course.) There’s no reason to linger on it, so get it out of your headspace as quickly as possible.

• Reach out to a writing friend for support – they will understand.

• Work on a different manuscript. All your eggs are not in one basket! Have many baskets!! BE THE EASTER BUNNY OF EGGS.

• Know that: 1.) all writers have been rejected, and 2.) it will get easier. I can safely say I’ve received hundreds of form rejections. They still sting a little, but WAY less than they used to.

Post-Publishing Feedback (i.e. Bad Reviews)

• Put on the playlist. (see below)

• Remember the silver linings for 3 stars and below:
  • 3 stars: As a reader, these are the reviews I read before I buy a book. They usually list things they did and did not like about the book and can be very helpful. And as a writer, I have definitely used and grown from 3-star feedback.
  • 1 & 2 stars: Sure, your book wasn’t for them, but your book managed to reach people outside of your friends and family! That’s a huge win for exposure, and there’s no popular book that doesn’t have these, so try to treat it as a rite of passage.

• Reach out to a writing friend for support – they will understand.

• Pull up the Goodreads page for your favorite book ever, read the 1-star reviews, and have a laugh.

• Reread your good reviews. Don’t let that single 1-star review negate those dozens of 4 and 5 stars. There are 8 billion people in the world and counting, no book is for everyone!

• Rejoice! Someone read your book and took the time to review it, and in many instances, the number of reviews is more important than the average rating.

• Work on your next book. Because you’re still growing as a writer, and this is only the middle of your journey. Rest if you need to, and then keep on going.

Oh, and don’t forget to jam while you’re at it:

As always, thanks for reading! If you have any questions and thoughts, I’d love to hear them in the comments!